Saturday, 12 September 2009

I'm More Important Than You

Well the fuel pump is up the shoot !!

It takes the engineers 6 hours to change and while it's being changed, we can only run on the remaining engines.

There is always rivalry between the three main departments on a cruise ship.

The Deck department think they are the most important because they steer the ship from port to port and stop it hitting icebergs.

The Technical department believe they are the most important because they keep everything working.

Without them, the ship wouldn't be going anywhere.

The hotel department know they are the most important.

Without them, the ship wouldn't make any money.

Without them, the company wouldn't be able to pay the poncy navigators in their whites and Ray-bans.

It wouldn't be able to pay the pale-skinned troglodytes who spend their time in that hot, noisy cavern of an engine room.

Anyway, the Ray-bans are chewing their pencils nervously, the engineers are up their elbows in heavy fuel oil and the hotel staff just smile and amuse the passengers by wiggling to the B52's around the pool.

That didn't work, so they got the passengers to whack the hell out of each other over the swimming pool. Everybody was amused by the violence and the blood didn't show because it was diluted by the water in the pool.

If we are not in port by 0700 tomorrow, the proverbial will hit the fan and the Company will not be pleased.


  1. What are those girls sat on so precariously?

  2. Slippery Pole - Old ships game. Used to be a greased ships spar in a canvas swimming pool.

    Now is a bit more high tech - stainless steel pole and chlorine pool.


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